Tuvia

My friend told me about a scholar she worked with earlier this year named Tuvia. Friend recently had lunch with him, an older gentleman, and he's the type of person with whom you immediately feel comfortable. Trustworthy. Makes you want to spill your guts, ask for advice. You know the type. He's happy, comfortable, wise, and a good listener.

So he tells this story about a young man and a young woman who notice each other on the bus one day. They sit across from each other, making frequent eye contact. Both want to speak, but are afraid. They hesitate, and eventually part without talking. Both regret their loss. He told it as a fairly sad story, I imagine, but followed up with poignant statements about there being no reason to stop yourself from doing or saying things you feel you should, especially when it's simply fear that's holding you back. Stop waiting for the perfect moment. Say what you mean. Do what you feel. Be who you want to be.

I think we need to hear these things from time to time. I get caught up in day-to-day requirements and sometimes lose track of my larger life priorities. I like to hear these things from these people I admire, and I'm so glad my friend shared it with me.

At the end of lunch he turned to her and said, "Don't be that young woman on the bus."

*sigh*

Remember Joey McIntyre?

I do. I remember him well. Not as well as this chick, but I was pretty sweet on him. And when I look back, I think, "I'm not nearly as silly-obsessive about these things as I used to be. I'm balanced. Healthy. Wise." Yeah, right. I'm 28. Wise is at least 30 years away at best.

I know this because I've had two very humbling experiences in the last week. 1: I went to a wedding of a friend who is both younger and wiser than I. At this wedding, I fell for her brother. Her happily married brother who wouldn't remember my name today if asked. And like a 13-year-old girl, I sulked all evening because I couldn't have this perfect man. Grow up, Duchess! This kind of perspective of one's own idiocy can be painful. Blech. 2: I was inconsiderate to a friend this week. I made an assumption that completely disregarded her feelings (not on purpose! just not thinking...) and she called me on it. So now I feel like the Duchess of assholery instead of cleave. Ew.

Do you ever feel so uncomfortable with a memory you're replaying that you have to get up and move or change the song you're listening to or something? I'm in that mode right now: stagnant discomfort with self. I hate that. But I deserve it, so I guess I just have to let/make myself feel it and deal. Again, ew.

UPDATE: I wrote this earlier today and am now feeling much better. Happy to reminisce about Joey, thinking I resolved things with slighted friend, and full of a delicious belated birthday dinner. Mmmmmm.

Ever been on a cruise?

I went on an Alaskan Cruise with my mom and Grandma through Holland America a couple of years ago. Very pretty, but if I were to do it again, I’d probably want to do a Caribbean or Mediterranean Cruise and be sunny and swimming. However, one thing I never worried about while on board was this. WTF? Should we be worrying about international law enforcement on these cruise lines? Scary!!!!